by Amy Matthews | Nov 13, 2018 | Inspiration |
Twelve years ago I went to Goa, India with my sister to attend a lavish, off the charts birthday party of one of her friends. We then met her husband and kids and explored Rajasthan. After an amazing 10 days, we parted ways as they were continuing on and I was flying back to San Francisco that night.
I had a full day to explore Delhi on my own. The hotel told me about a grand bizarre that was happening that day, a place selling beautiful, Indian scarves and shawls. It was held in a large warehouse and individual artisans were selling their creations. The space was dark and dimly lit.
I was looking at a particular shawl and asked the artisan if there was better light to see. He didn’t understand what I was asking and I heard a man’s voice behind me translating what I was saying. As I turned around to see who was helping me, a very tall, handsome Indian man, with sparkly brown eyes was smiling at me.
We struck up a conversation. His name was Niraj. He lived in Washington D.C., worked for the World Bank and was In India visiting his parents. Our interaction was light and playful, yet intense, in an out of this world way. We exchanged information.
As I walked away, I said to myself, Wow, what was that?
When my plane landed back in the States, I had an email from Niraj, asking me to meet for tea the following day. I told him I had just flown back and he said he would call me when he returned home in a couple of weeks. At that moment, even though we lived on opposite coasts, I knew we would get together. I just knew – in my heart and soul.
After being back in San Francisco for a month, I wondered why I hadn’t heard from Niraj. A couple days later, he called. He told me he was at John Hopkins hospital. He had returned from India 2 weeks prior and was having dizzy spells. After many tests, he found out he had a rare type of brain cancer.
Life can change on a dime.
Crazy as it sounds, I had a feeling I could fall in love with this man – and at the same time – I thought he might die. It scared me. Instead of moving towards it, I decided to protect myself. I rationalized my feelings – we could stay in touch and be friends.
Niraj died less than one year after we met. I’ve learned a lot since then. Looking back, I regret not saying “Yes” to it. I could have experienced love of a lifetime. It could have changed my life forever.
What moves your heart and soul? What are you not saying YES to? Whatever it is, go forward. Even if it’s scary. Or inconvenient. Or messy.
Life is shorter than we think. Take action towards what you want – that brings you joy – that stirs you – every single day.
Heed the call. Live with #NoRegrets.
by Amy Matthews | Nov 4, 2018 | Mindset |
I believe in serendipity and magic. Do you?
To recognize it, you have to be open to it. You have to make room for it. If you’re distracted, not present or attached to how it’s supposed to be, it’s difficult to see magic when it shows up in life. It requires being in the moment.
I also believe in being clear on who you are and you what you really want. Not what you wanted 10 years ago or a year ago. What you want right now. Once you know, start taking decisive and repeated action – every single day – towards your dream for yourself, your community or for the world. And, be flexible on how things unfold.
Why? It’s where the land of possibility resides.
Here’s an example:
You set an intention to find a life partner. You create a list of attributes:
Super smart, attractive, well-educated, sexy, charismatic, financially successful, athletic, thoughtful, loving, loads of fun, funny, likes to cook, loves dogs and travel, a good communicator and subscribes to the New York Times.
Hmm…that’s pretty specific. How about something like this instead?
I’m open if he/she is kind, has a ton of integrity and we’re comfortable together. I’ll know it when I see it. Or better yet, I’ll know if when I feel it.
When you’re open, opportunities knock at your door. Serendipity is your friend. It works the same way in business and in every area of life.
I love this quote by Johann Wolfgang von Goethe:
Magic is Believing in Yourself. If You Can Do That, You Can Make Anything Happen.
Believe in Yourself. Believe in Possibilities. Believe in Serendipity.
No matter what – Believe. If You Do, You Will Receive.
by Amy Matthews | Oct 30, 2018 | In-Power |
Many of us undermine ourselves – every single day – without realizing it.
I don’t know about you but my parents taught me to be modest, humble and always care about others first. My dad – with his self deprecating humor – my mom a perfectionist not able to receive compliments. Both amazing people in their own right.
What did I learn? Instead of embracing my greatness, I playing small. I accommodated others. I learned other people’s needs and wants were more important than mine. So therefore, other people were more important than I was. Whoa.
Downplaying myself became the norm. Self doubt crept in. I became my worst critic. I felt inadequate. I adopted the belief of “I am not good enough.”
Sound familiar?
It took a long time to unravel those beliefs and behaviors. I am happy to say I no longer berate myself. I am much more forgiving of myself because I can say I love and accept myself…at least 90 percent of the time.
If I can do it, so can you.
You are powerful beyond measure. You are brilliant. Let your light shine.
by Amy Matthews | Oct 23, 2018 | In-Power |
The best laid plans often go awry.
When you finally decide to focus on yourself, to do something for you, whether it be hiring a coach, a trainer, psychologist or you sign up for that class you’ve wanted to take, inevitably something comes up and gets in the way.
Your Parents Need Help
A Client Has an Emergency
Your Child Gets Sick
Or the Puppy Gets Sick
We’re culturally programmed to take care of others first. So when others need our help, what do women do? We take something off our plate – the very thing we want and
need the most.
So how do we make ourselves a priority and not abandon our needs and wants?
We stay committed to ourselves. To what we want. To what we’ve agreed to do for ourselves. We ask for help. We find a way. Especially in the midst of chaos – when life feels uncontrollable and messy.
Even when shit hits the fan – make yourself a priority. You are Numero Uno.
by Amy Matthews | Oct 15, 2018 | Mindset |
You’ve heard me say this before.
We’re the ones who hold ourselves back from realizing our full potential.
Every single one of us – women and men – from an early age, believed what we were told or put our own spin on what others said to us – even if it wasn’t true.
We all have stories from early in our lives that have shaped us. Here’s one of mine.
I was with my older sister and a friend of hers, hanging out in the front yard after dinner. I was seven years old and much younger than they were. They wanted to ditch the little sister. My sister’s friend said to me: “You better go to bed, you need your beauty sleep.”
What I heard her say was: I was ugly. I held that belief for a very long time.
I had lunch this weekend with a prior client of mine. He’s super smart. I mean he’s brilliant. And successful. He told me this story:
Though he went to Columbia for undergrad and has a Stanford MBA, graduated top of his class, he never thought he was smart because he struggled as a child to learn how to read. He didn’t recognize he was smart until a CEO whom he worked for told him he was. He was 38 years old.
Each and everyone of us has bought into limiting beliefs that keep us small and feeling bad about ourselves. These beliefs and feelings are in past time.
What are you telling yourself that is getting in the way of what you want most?
I’m Not Smart Enough
I Don’t Have Time
I’m Too Old
I’m Not Thin Enough
What If I Fail
It’s up to you to be listen to your thought patterns. Question your beliefs and let go of the ones that don’t serve you. Because they aren’t true.
You Are Enough. You Can Do Anything. Yes You Can.
Unleash the Most Awesome Version of Yourself. It’s Time.
